Dear broken-hearted

“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.”  – C.S. Lewis

Love ANYTHING and your heart will be wrung and possibly

There are thousands of things that can break our heart, the most common probably being uncorresponded love, the ending of a romantic relationship, infidelity and other things that fall under the “romance” category. HOWEVER, there are so many other things that can break our heart, like perhaps betrayal from a dear friend, a dream that is shattered, a door of opportunity that closes, rejection from someone you look up to, being unnoticed and feeling invisible, a failure, having a dysfunctional family, or even a vocational disappointment; the list goes on and on and it could be something big or the smallest detail.

I’m gonna take a guess here and say that we’ve all been there. I bet we all know exactly what a broken-heart feels like, and if you don’t, chances are that at some point in your life you will. So this letter is for all of those broken hearts out there. I may not know what your story or situation is exactly, but I know the feeling and I know it well; and so this letter is for you.

Dear broken-hearted 💔

I know you are hurting, probably trying to pick up the shattered pieces and stitch up what’s left of your heart. Your hope threatened by the shadow of your fears and your faith deafened by the lies.

Do you feel like you may never be able to love again?

Does the idea of trusting someone with your heart terrify you?

Do you wonder if anyone will ever know how to hold your heart; when will someone see you for who you really are and who you are be more than enough?

Do you wonder if there is such a thing as “the one”; that once in a lifetime kind of love?

Do you wonder when will it be your time to shine?

Do you wonder if trusting, waiting, hoping and believing are worth it after all?

You know, i’ve been there too; with a shattered hope and a scattered heart, trying to pick up the pieces left and make sense of it all. But i never could, not on my own that is, not leaning on my own understanding. Sometimes it took time to heal, add to that forgiveness, it took tears to surrender, prayer and worship to fix my eyes on the bigger picture and a lot of persevering; holding on to faith and never giving up on hope.

I’ve been where you are, i’ve been through that process you must undergo and I am on the other side, where you long to be … and let me assure you the answer to all of those questions is:
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You are so much stronger than you think. It is in the undoing that we find ourselves. To feel is to be alive! We are not numb or absent; pain proves we are alive. Feel every emotion, cry and free your heart of the pain and burden and then simply let it go. Your heart feels fragile but it can be made whole again. You can and you will love again.

*But remember that love starts not within yourself but in God and through Jesus; the source of true and the purest love. And your heart was made to love HIM first and above all. THAT is our first & foremost PURPOSE: to love HIM & be loved by HIM.

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Who you are is more than enough! We are all works in progress, learning, growing and becoming, but all those things that make you “you” and make you “different” is what makes you beautiful. You are lovable, valuable and that doesn’t change or diminish with someone’s inability to see it or appreciate it.

*Remember you are valuable and so much that someONE gave his life for you; Jesus saw you were worth it all! Now that’s an unmatchable worth and a high price to pay!

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Somewhere in this world, there is someone who one day will look at you and love you for who you are and will only see beauty in what you see as imperfections. Don’t blind yourself; a man who makes you feel like you need to apologize for being strong, determined, shy – whatever makes you “you”- is not a man worth your time or your heart. Be confident and stand up for yourself. People can talk all they want and they WILL push and pull you in many directions but at the end of the day what matters is what you tell yourself and come to believe in your heart.

*But remember that the only voice that defines you is God’s voice of truth. Fight to keep HIS voice ever present and the loudest in your life.

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There is such a thing as “the one” … the one you were made for and was made for you … but understand that “The One” is God! You were made to love Him and be loved by Him! That should be your heart’s purpose and desire! And IF God’s divine and perfect plan for your life includes a companion for life, a future husband, being a God of details, you can bet He knows who would be the best fit for you. If God cares for the littlest of details like knowing how many hairs are on your head, how much more would He care for something as big as the person you’ll share your life with and influence your existence, path and decisions. If You let Him take control of your heart and place His will above yours, He will be faithful to guide your steps and synchronize your heart to His.

*But remember that wholeness or completeness won’t come with finding the love of your life, fulfilling a dream or accomplishing a lifetime goal. Nothing will fill your heart like Jesus; you can and will only find completeness in HIM alone. The rest are blessings that are added on.

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Trusting, waiting, hoping and believing are WORTH IT! Many times we place our hope on the end result, on reaching that for which we so anxiously await, that we miss the point, we miss the process. Life happens in the journey, in the lessons that lie between the now and the hope or the promise. It’s in the waiting that we show our consistency, in the uncertainty that we come to know hope, in the questioning that we find answers, in weakness that we are made strong, it’s the lessons learned that teach us wisdom and in our imperfection and humanity that we come to understand grace and experience unconditional love.

*So remember that life happens in the process, in the in-betweens, in the little moments. Live IN the right nows, while being eternity-minded, and face every moment full on; that is where your becoming lies!

 

And one more thing: sometimes it’s the scariest endings that turn out to be beginnings to the most exciting and beautiful chapters. A seed had to die in order for a flower to bloom.

Cry all you need to but don’t let your pain keep you stuck there. Stop being afraid. Stop letting your fears gain ground! Instead, conquer your fears and hold on to hope; let hope win! And be strong and brave enough to wait! Don’t settle for a “good enough” or a “for right now”. You were made for greatness! You hold greatness within you! Dare to be different, even if you have to stand alone.

So dear broken-hearted know that “broken” is not who you are

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Sincerely,

a heart made whole again

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written by

Pamela Praniuk

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